welcome back?

I'm not entirely sure how to start this, I mean I could say I'm sorry that I haven't been here, but you probably didn't miss me much...
My depressing life,, the normal boring shit.
My hospital trips,,
Self harm,
Where ever Ana's fucked off to right now.
Probably gone on holiday. I'm too much of a fail. But hey, can't have everything that you want in life :/
I got my hair cut off yesturday, it kinda cheered me up.
But I still have everythibg lurking in the back of my mind.

I put on 40lbs in hospital.

My life really sucks.

I was in hospital for a while, hence the absence of my un-read, um-interesting posts.

But I was really good when I got out, I didn't let a single piece of food pass these lips for 4 whole days. Until today, I took money into morrisons. I bought ben and jerrys, ate the whole pot in about 5 mins, maybe less.

I was sick, but I still feel discusting and full.

I feel like braking down into tears of the thought of having 2000 calories pumping round my system...
Its enough to make me want to die. I'm such a failer...

Meanwhile, being on medds for almost any mental coindition on the planet is proving to be the most difficult thing to keep up with in the world
I'm not sure how too cope with everything atm...

Life is out too get me.
HELP!

Star xxx